Mending the Heart: The Art of Kintsugi and Reiki Healing
Mending the Heart: The Art of Kintsugi and Reiki Healing
Of the many Japanese words that have caught my eye while living in Japan, and there are so many, Kintsugi 金継ぎ is one of my favorites. Although I rarely hear or see it in daily life, I love the word Kintsugi, which loosely translates to "golden repair." Kintsugi is a technique to repair broken ceramics with gold, allowing the original item to remain useful while adding a new and perhaps even more beautiful appearance. I’ve shared this concept in several of my virtual Reiki classes since coming to Japan because it's meaning has helped me to personally understand Reiki on a more profound level.
Both Kintsugi and Reiki embrace imperfections, transforming them into something beautiful and valuable. For example, I’ve struggled with overthinking to the point of debilitating worry and chronic people-pleasing. Despite years of therapy, which helped me understand the roots of these behaviors, they persisted. In desperation, I began to send myself Reiki for these issues. I can't explain exactly how it worked, but as I sat with the feelings of helplessness and gave myself Reiki, I began to feel better, even stronger. If I could describe what was happening internally it was as though the need to impress or prove myself to others transformed into a personal strength—the ability to genuinely understand and care about others. Reiki helped me feel this transformation from within, and that felt miraculous and beautiful. Similarly, Kintsugi repairs a break in an item, reinforcing it making it stronger and more beautiful than before. The breaks become emphasized instead of hidden, creating greater depth and uniqueness to its story.
In this way, the process of Kintsugi can be likened to a healing journey.
With Kintsugi, patience and care are required from beginning to end. It’s not just about gluing pieces back together but about honoring the fact that the larger piece will never be the same again. It’s a tender process of letting go of the past and bravely embracing the new. Holding onto the way things once were is like living in the past rather than in the present moment. In a healing journey, the same thing must happen within the person’s heart and psyche when life throws its curveballs. They must acknowledge the change, no matter how painful and impossible it feels, and, by accepting healing, they consciously turn their mind from a victimized mindset toward a hopeful outlook. That acknowledgment is an acceptance of life’s impermanence. The only thing we can control in life is our emotional response to change. The better equipped we become to letting the constant of change empower us, the better we will feel as we move through life’s uncertainties. We'll feel continually stronger.
When we look at a piece of Kintsugi, it can be like looking at our own scars and celebrating them instead of hiding them away in shame. I have a large scar on the left side of my abdomen from a major spinal surgery when I was 15. Whenever I see or touch it, I’m reminded of the emotional and physical trauma from that time and often feel the urge to hide it or laugh it away if someone happens to see and ask about it. But when I see a Kintsugi piece, it’s like looking at my own scars—both seen and unseen—and realizing that they are a part of my life experience. There’s no need to feel shame or embarrassment for being alive. Instead, I feel more inclined to embrace my scars, acknowledging them as marks of something I’ve gone through, and learned from that have allowed me to become a wiser and more compassionate being.
In the Kintsugi process, each piece must be carefully cleaned, and rough edges must be smoothed before the joining can occur. Next, the glue is mixed to the right consistency using natural ingredients, then applied to the edges of the breaks. After joining, multiple applications may be necessary to fill gaps, and finally the gold powder is added just as carefully. The drying process must be handled with care as well, as temperature and humidity can affect drying time. As you can see, patience and care are required throughout, demanding the repairer’s full focus.
Similarly, during a person’s healing journey, constant care and attention to the changes happening along the way are crucial and yet due to the demands of daily life are oftentimes overlooked. Proper attention is necessary to ensure that the time for integration needed to move through a painful memory or experience is given and not ignored. Integration time in healing is akin to allowing adequate drying time in Kintsugi, which creates structural integrity in the new object, otherwise the same breaks may happen again and again. So, we can think of integration time and integrity as going hand in hand. In a healing journey we develop integrity of mind when we're able to give the necessary attention, focus and committment to our process. Whatever we are working to overcome through our healing can make us stronger and better equipped to face life in a fresh new way. Our healing journey allows us to celebrate life’s challenges and personal growth rather than shun our weaknesses or feel burdened by life.
Learning about Kintsugi has helped me to understand Reiki in a new way as well. When we receive Reiki over time, we can gradually discover the the issues that directly affect our emotional responses, physical health, and mental well-being, transform into something valuable for our lives and perhaps for others as well. I remember about a year after my father passed away, a new student joined a Reiki 1 class I was teaching around that time. She had never heard of Reiki before but felt immediately drawn to the flyer. Later, she shared that her father had just passed away and was deep in her grieving process. For me, holding a space of understanding for her was also healing me in a way I didn't know I needed -- it gave value to my own grief. I realized then that a beautiful bond forms between the healer (someone who has gone through their own healing journey) and recipient (someone who is in need of guidance), each filling the other with deeper understanding and loving light. This mirrors the process of bonding and filling with gold in Kintsugi.
In this way, we are all both healer and recipient at once. A good way to illustrate this is when we give ourselves Reiki. I’d like to offer a simple Reiki practice exercise for healing ourselves by “filling ourselves with golden light.”
Sit in a comfortable position with your eyes closed and take a few deep breaths. Notice any areas of your body that begin to feel comfortable and relaxed, as well as any racing thoughts in your mind. Let everything smooth itself out as you continue to observe. Slowly recite the 5 Reiki Principles aloud to yourself:
Just for today, I will not anger
Just for today, I will not worry
Just for today, I will be grateful
Just for today, I will do my work honestly
Just for today, I will be kind to every living being
Notice if any of these principles evoke a feeling of “rough edges” or being “rubbed the wrong way” in your emotional landscape or psyche. For example, whenever I share these principles in a group practice, many students agree that the first or second principles tend to bring up the strongest feelings of unrest. This is what I mean by a “rough edge.” It feels like something unprocessed, causing stress or tension in the body just by remembering or thinking of it. It could be as personal as a conflict in the workplace or as general as a global issue. For this exercise, understand this as a space or a crack like in Kintsugi that needs filling.
As hard as it might be, I gently ask you to hold this feeling of distress in your heart. Don’t try to “get over it” or avoid it; simply and honestly feel what you feel without needing to do anything with it. Take your time with it. If it's too hard to feel then perhaps come back to this exercise another day or simply give yourself Reiki. Once you’re fully present with it, bring your Reiki hands to a part of your body and hold them there, giving yourself Reiki. Your hands and Reiki will know where to go. If you prefer more guidance, bring both hands to the middle of your chest or heart area and give yourself Reiki. Imagine golden light flowing from your hands to the exact place within your being that needs it most. You don’t need to know where it’s going—just have faith that it’s reaching the root of the tension.
Continue giving yourself Reiki until you feel the tension in your body begin to lessen and lift. You’ll know it’s happening by the way you feel. Sometimes I'll see a subtle smile come over my students' faces or they will begin to breathe more easily. This may take time or happen quickly—be patient either way. When you feel that you’ve received the golden light of Reiki for your “rough edge,” carefully remove your hands and sit in gratitude for this experience of “golden Reiki repair” for as long as feels good. Then, bring your hands together in prayer position or Gassho and give thanks to Reiki for this healing.
When we embrace life’s changes and heal through the emotions that accompany them—whether with Reiki or another mode of healing, like Kintsugi—we can construct a life filled with even more beauty, peace, and inner-strength than we ever imagined. One could argue that we are already perfect beings with nothing to heal, and I wouldn’t disagree. But I would add: We are also human beings living a human experience, and it’s our right and privilege to transform all our hurt, pain, and heartbreak into a more beautiful existence for ourselves and loved ones.
Filling ourselves with gold or golden light will mean something different to each of us. What does it mean for you? For me it means being able to honor the needs of my heart despite feeling guilt or fear of what others will think. I invite you to see your own life as Kintsugi, where every heartbreak or change is an opportunity to transform yourself into a stronger and more beautiful version of you. I’d love to hear your thoughts or experiences, please share them in the comments below!
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